December 11, 2005

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  I like to do Push-Ups at the Wild-Life Zoo
  
  Tagging along with my neighbor to the fitness gym for the past month, sometimes I wonder if I should I bring a bottle of water, or a safari camera along. Seriously, the people that goes there haven't fully developed into humans yet. Undergo Darwins theory of evolution one more time, and maybe I'll be your workout partner.

  Aerobic fitness worker AKA "the penguins"
  These species at the gym likes to reveal their manhood by wearing bright rainbow colors sweat, along with their funky headbands. They are always in the aerobic room together, if I wasn't mistaken, I could have sworn it was a gay fest. Tuning to "cant touch this" by mc hammer, they step up and down off there "power stepper" continuously non stop. Please stop! yall look like fuking penguins doing that exercise. Why the hell would you guys pay 30 bucks for membership fee, when you can do the same exercise with a damn dictionary. For a limited time offer, you guys can come over and workout with my closet door. Open the door, close the door, Repeat for the low price of 30 bucks.

  
  "teehehee, lets go read cosmo girl after this"

  Rednecks
  I'm tired of you guys taking up 3-4 parking spaces with yalls damn trailer RV vehicles at the gym. Me and my neighbor were waiting for these rednecks at the bench press machine, and we both got a good laugh. These guys were benching 1 rep, then immediately run over to the mirror and flexed their biceps. First of all bench pressing works out your chest, not your biceps. Second of all doing 1 rep will not make your muscles any swoller than it was before. On top of looking like an idiot flexing in the mirror, when they use all there strength and tighten there face. Their hill billy gap teeth sticks out. Do me a favor and take your shotguns, and place 2 packs of beer on each side, and start bench pressing with that at your own trailer park, Not at a public gym.

  
  "I wonder why im hated so much at the gyms pool"

  People who tell life storys
  I was running on the treadmill. While I was running, this guy comes up to me and tells me his divorce story. He was from Hong Kong, and told me his wife was in a hostage situation. He explained to me that he shot his wife in the leg, hopeing the person who was capturing her would find her useless and let her go. His wife thought he was part of the crime, and never talked to him again and eventually filed a divorce. As interesting as the story may be, I was trying to concentrate moving forward on the treadmill. Trying to start a conversation with someone while they are in a state of adrenaline is a difinite NO NO. I don't care if you met some girl on the net, or lost your virginity. I'm just trying to finish my sets and workout program and get the hell out of here.

  
  "this explains why you talk to me at the gym. Even your grandma don't give a damn about your life storys"

  • 1:03 pm
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